Body Image

Hopefully in the next few months I will undergo a procedure called Cool Sculpting. It's to remove
unwanted fat from my stomach. I've tried exercise & trying to eat right but nothing works for me.
Over the past year or so my body has gone through some changes and I'm not happy. I have inquired about it, don't know when I'll get it done, hopefully over the summer, I'm not too worried about achieving a "summer body" right not because I'm not a fan of the sun too much as it is. Right now I'm probably around 160 something & 5'8".  I haven't weighed myself since my last doctor visit. To most people I'm "skinny", I get what they mean but yea probably standing next to them I look it but I'm not really. I just wanna do what will make me feel good & better about myself.

Testing 112

Trying again... We'll see how much attention I put into this because,  sometimes I just don't wanna talk on Facebook. I like to vent, not always negative stuff, just whatever comes to mind.

Social Networking

I do ok social networking, but when it comes to meeting people in person...I am really shy. Same with meeting guys, I will not approach a guy, my strong fear of rejection is what stops me. I know rejection is apart of life, but year getting rejected by a guy is not something I wanna endure. I hate large crowds of people. I am good one on one with folks, when I get comfortable with people I do talk...A lot. I've been known to throw a chair ONCE and my mama have never let me forget it. LOL! I let my anger get the best of me, the person didn't deserve it nor did he get hurt, but if I was to do it over again I'd still do it. I'm starting to love Twitter again, it's because of the people I talk to on there especially  I'm  facebook girl too, but yea. twitter is my thing right now.

Starting Over

It's July 4, 2012..It's been along time since I've wrote in this thing, doesn't mean I don't still write, just not here. I want to start over again. I was motivated  last night. We'll see how long this will last.

Hoping whoever read this had a good 4th. Spent mine with family. I always have things I'm thinking about but I'm slow about writing down. So if u read I welcome you, if you don't it doesn't matter. whelp, I need to get ready for tomorrow cause I do have to work. g'night.

Out with mama....

My plan was to leave the house, go get my breeze card, go by lennox & look around for somethings. I did wanna go back to Bath & Body works for something. Last night mama offered to take me to the job. I will never decline a free ride that would take me 2 hours to get to by bus. We ended up at Ross afterwards. I hate that she is the type to ask me where I wanna go, but then turn around and tell me where we are going. I wasn't gonna bother to answer either way. I hate going to Ross, it reminds me of store where other stores drop off their unwanted or over stocked stuff. It's too messy for me. I like Marshalls though. She found some cute stuff for me and I bought some things, but yea. My excitement level goes way down once I enter that store.

I like Wal-mart, I love Target for some reason. Maybe its because of the one I frequent near Lennox/Phillips.

We went to get something to eat. Captain D's by the westend & a dozen of assorted Donuts at Krispy Kreme was cause the hot light is not on yet.

Weight rant

I've been want to have flatter abs, but working on my own is not working so I decided to get a personal trainer. I start on Friday. The only person who honestly comments about my weight{ALOT} is my mama. Keeps saying if I keep eating then I'll end up like her, she not all that big, but in away I don't wanna get any bigger, I'm already pushing 155. I'm used to being at 140 something, but I guess my metabolism is slowing up. I really wish she would stop pinching at my damn sides. If she wasn't my mama she'd get hit.

The trainer wants me to write down everything I eat and drink. I'm gonna start today & just eat small portions of dinner and see if that helps.

Speech Therapy

I've always attended Speech Therapy since I started school until I graduated HS. A way to get out of class for awhile was good enough for me. During my Sr. year me and my teacher agreed that I would just practice on the letters and sound I had prob with, which are D, S, T , & the 2 TH sounds. During that time I "fell in love" with Ryan Cameron's show on the radio and whenever I got a chance to be on either his show or this other one called "Ralph From Ben Hill" I'd taped it and play it for my teacher. We'd basically go over my mistakes because I am never that conscious of how I pronounce things as I'm talking. I hate the sound of my voice at times however there are shows I like to call into & when I finally hear myself after it's posted I'm either cringing or seriously listening to myself. I'm conscious in the beginning, but after a minute or 2 I forget.I honestly miss it.